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Thanks to Nellie’s, I’m not the same person I was before

Posted on: December 23rd, 2022 by Nellie's No Comments

In August 2003, 16-year-old Sheena Mallari and her newborn daughter Rosalyn were brought to Nellie’s after a friend called the Children’s Aid Society following an abusive situation between Sheena and her partner. A week and a half later, on the eve of Sheena’s 17th birthday, Children’s Aid returned and removed Rosalyn from Sheena’s care, declaring her an unfit mother. Rosalyn was less than a month old.

“The staff at Nellie’s were always there for me, no matter what happened. They always believed in me,” says Sheena. Over the next six months, Sheena enrolled in high school classes, worked part-time, and with the help of the Nellie’s team, managed to get her daughter back full-time. A year later, Sheena graduated high school.

“I didn’t want to be a statistic. I knew that I was a minority, a young mother, and I was living in a shelter,” explains Sheena. “I had to keep looking forward — cut the noise, focus on myself, and focus on my daughter.”

Now, almost 20 years later, Sheena still remembers so many details from her time at Nellie’s, especially from that very first night. She built a strong connection with one staff member in particular, Maureen Caines-Comrie, Nellie’s shelter program manager, and the two still share a close bond to this day.

“I didn’t even want her to leave me [in my room] the first night I was there, I just wanted her to stay with me,” says Sheena. “I owe her so much love and respect, because that’s what she gave me.”

During the year that she lived at the shelter, Nellie’s staff also helped Sheena navigate the court system not only to restore her daughter back to her care, but also to arrange anger management programs and couples counseling for her and her partner. With the support of Nellie’s, Sheena and her partner were able to reconcile, and are still together today. “Thanks to Nellie’s, I’m not the same person I was before. I’m not afraid to speak my mind to my partner anymore. I’m not scared,” says Sheena.

Today, the couple have three children: 19-year-old Rosalyn, 16-year-old Sherlyn, and 7-year-old Serafina. Rosalyn is studying criminology at Wilfrid Laurier University, while Sherlyn is in grade 11 with dreams of becoming a teacher. Serafina is in grade 2, and like most kids her age, she is obsessed with Roblox. In addition to raising her daughters, Sheena has had a successful career in accounts payable, and currently works for a global chemical distribution company.

“Nellie’s helps you build a proper foundation of where you want to be in life,” says Sheena. “They really helped me to be where I am right now. I’d always been dependent on other people, and they’d always put me down. And the only place that didn’t, was Nellie’s.”

When it comes to her history with her partner, Sheena is an open book with her older daughters. “I wanted them to know what we went through. I needed them to know,” she says. “Because I don’t want them to face what I did. I want them to have better. And I want them to know that there’s somewhere they can go in Toronto, if they ever need it.”

A message from Executive Director Jyoti Singh

Posted on: August 31st, 2022 by Nellie's No Comments

The move to the new shelter in February has opened up a lot of new possibilities for us. It is no secret that in the old building, we were cramped for space. At 8,900 sq. ft., we had 36 beds in only nine bedrooms. Our Children’s Program was held in a single, small playroom in the basement. There were few private areas and because of the lack of congregate spaces, in-shelter group programs often had to be held at our Administrative and Community Services Office a few blocks away. (An obstacle which would sometimes deter women from attending.)

Now, aside from the fact that we have up to 40 beds across 22 bedrooms (each with their own bathroom), the entire third floor is dedicated to providing impactful programs for women and their children. Anyone who has ever lived through a major renovation or construction project knows that the settling-in process, and the finishing touches process, is never ending, but just being in this new building opens up our ability to provide help and support far beyond crisis housing and support programs. It allows us to better empower women in achieving their individualized goals while also working to create the social change needed to stem the flow of violence on a systemic level.

In the spring, we became the first gender-based violence organization in Canada to implement the world-renowned anti-bullying program, Rock and Water, to support the healing and growth of children living at Nellie’s. A few months later, we introduced PAVE Prevention (Proactive Anti-Violence Education) for the women living at Nellie’s. It is a trauma-informed program dedicated to creating safer workplaces and communities around the world by providing training on proactively preventing, responding to and healing from violent events. But the goal of PAVE is even greater; we are raising funds to enable Nellie’s staff to undergo PAVE facilitator training in order to teach these proven prevention tools to our community partners in an effort to manage violence and micro-aggressions before they become crisis situations.

Our capital campaign also continues as we raise the funds needed to convert the building into a fully accessible one. (Currently, it is partially accessible as the elevator does not go to all floors. As well, only the basement building entrance is accessible as there are only stairs, and no ramp, at the front entrance.) When someone with a disability comes to Nellie’s – any disability at all—we want her to know that we are here to help her, and being fully accessible is one of the ways we can make sure she knows that.

Our role in the community is a demanding one, but we are proud to be leading change by developing innovative solutions to shape a clear and distinctive path forward for those who need us most. It is easy for organizations in any sector to continue to follow the same tried and tested path. But as we approach our 50^th anniversary in 2023, we are committed to trying new approaches and tactics in order to make an even greater impact. Some may be more successful than others, but leading change is about being innovative and thinking differently so that one day, we will realize a world free of oppression and violence for all women and children.

For more information on supporting Nellie’s, please contact Ingrid Graham, Director of Development at Ingrid@nellies.org or at 416-645-1419 or click here to donate now!

Volunteer at Nellie’s!

Posted on: June 28th, 2013 by Nellie's No Comments

We are currently recruiting for the following volunteer positions:

1) Administration Volunteer: Nellie’s Administration Office is encouraging applications for one-year term Administration Volunteers to help with administrative work. Job duties include general admin. support ie: copying, typing, etc. We are looking for enthusiastic applications from women with basic computer & communication skills who are willing to donate a minimum of 4 hours a week during office hours between 9am-5pm. Please download the Volunteer Application Form here and specify “Administration Volunteer.” Selected applicants will be contacted in early August for an interview. A police check is required. Mandatory orientation for all volunteers will take place on August 28 & 29 from 6-9pm. Applications for 2013/14 close July 31.

2) Program Volunteer: Nellie’s Community Support & Outreach (CSO) Team is encouraging applications for one-year term Program Volunteers. Duties include helping out at our programs every Wednesday or Thursday morning from 10-noon, translating program materials to a group of Cantonese/Mandarin speaking clients, preparing snacks, making coffee/tea, tidying up service areas, cleaning the kitchen cupboards, etc. We are looking for enthusiastic applications from women who can speak fluent English & either Cantonese or Mandarin, and are willing to donate a minimum of 2-4 hours on every Wednesday of Thursday morning. Please download the Volunteer Application Form here and specify “Chinese Speaking Volunteer.” Selected applicants will be contacted in early August for an interview. A police check is required. Mandatory orientation for all volunteers will take place on August 28 & 29 from 6-9pm. Applications for 2013/14 close July 31.

3) Housekeeping Volunteer: Nellie’s women shelter is encouraging applications for one-year term Housekeeping Volunteers. This position includes physical activities such as lifting. Job duties include tidying up service areas, washing floors, washing dishes, cleaning the kitchen cupboards, microwave, fridge, screening donations etc. We are looking for enthusiastic applications from women who are willing to donate a minimum of 4-8 hours a week during office hours. Please download the Volunteer Application Form here and specify “Housekeeping Volunteer.” Selected applicants will be contacted in early August for an interview. A police check is required. Mandatory orientation for all volunteers will take place on August 28 & 29 from 6-9pm. Applications for 2013/14 close July 31.

4) Accessibility Advisory Committee Member: Nellie’s Shelter is committed to the eradication of the various forms of oppression that women and children experience such as violence, poverty and homelessness. We encourage women with disAbilities to apply for this position.

The Accessibility Advisory Committee (AAC) was arranged to review and provide recommendations to ensure accessibility for women with disabilities and Deaf women within Nellie’s and the broader community. The AAC, like the wider organization, is committed to working from a feminist, anti-racist, anti-oppressive perspective. We are committed to ensuring our services and practices meet the needs of women and children who are marginalized by racism, homophobia, transphobia and ableism. The AAC committee plans to look at and review policies and practices throughout the organization and beyond to ensure great accessibility for all women.

The AAC has been very active over the last year, including the development of a written position paper on Women and Accessibility. As part of our work plan we will be developing an annual accessibility plan and make necessary recommendations to the board. The plan and recommendations will address the pro-active identification of and the removal and prevention of barriers to women with disabilities and or Deaf women in the following areas; policies, programs, practices and services, employment opportunities, physical staff and professional development. Additionally we will explore and discuss current issues and trends relating to accessibility for women with disabilities and Deaf women and provide an opportunity for staff consultation and feedback on issues of accessibility relating to women with disabilities and Deaf women.

These are just a few examples of some of the exciting work that the committee is engaged in! If this sounds like something you would be interested in participating in, we invite you to submit an application to join our committee and work toward equity and a life free from oppression for all women and children.

Please download the Board/Board Committee Application Form here and email it to janna@nellies.org along with your resume. Selected applicants will be contacted in early August for an interview. A police check is required. Mandatory orientation for all volunteers will take place on August 28 & 29 from 6-9pm. Applications for 2013/14 close July 31.

5) Social Justice Committee Member: Nellie’s Shelter is committed to the eradication of the various forms of oppression that women and children experience such as violence, poverty and homelessness. Currently we are encouraging applications for one-year term Volunteer Social Justice Committee Members. The purpose of this committee is to develop annual social justice priorities and develop organizational positions on issues; to respond to emerging social justice issues impacting on women and children in the media; and to ensure that the principles of feminism, anti-racism and anti-oppression are consistently reflected and active in the entire organization.

If you are interested in the Social Justice Committee, please download the Board/Board Committee Application Form here and specify “Volunteer Board Committee Member.” Selected applicants will be contacted in early August for an interview. A police check is required. Mandatory orientation for all volunteers will take place on August 28 & 29 from 6-9pm. Applications for 2013/14 close July 31.

6) Health and Safety Student Placement: Nellie’s operates a 36-bed emergency shelter for women and children who are homeless and leaving violence. Currently we are encouraging volunteer applications from female students who are studying Home Inspection Program or House Health & Safety Certificate. This is a one-year term Volunteer position, your supervisor is our House Coordinator. Physical support is required.

Learning opportunities include:

1) Develop internal maintenance plans to ensure the shelter conforms to the existing fire, health & safety regulations.

2) Inform House Coordinator/Program Manager of any violation of health & safety or any mechanical breakdown or maintenance needs as they relate to the shelter, and arranges for minor repairs.

3) Oversee waste management and recycling.

4) Maintain/update maintenance record binders and Health & Safety Binder.

5) Help carry out monthly fire drills.

6) Facilitate weekly room checks.

7) Complete monthly shelter inspections and provides regular reports.

8) Actively participate on the Health & safety committee.

9) Organize and facilitate regular inspections with Public Health, Fire Department etc.

10) Other tasks as assigned.

We are looking for enthusiastic applications from female students who are willing to donate a minimum of 4-8 hours a week during office hours. Please send your resume and cover letter to janna@nellies.org. Visit www.nellies.org for more information about Nellie’s. If you are selected, you will receive a phone call for an interview in early August. A police check is required. A mandatory orientation for all volunteers will take place August 28 & 29 from 6-9pm. Deadline for applications is August 2, 2013.

What Does Nellie’s Mean To You?

Posted on: May 8th, 2013 by Nellie's No Comments

This year, 2013, marks Nellie’s 40th Anniversary. Over the years we have had the privilege of working with thousands of women, children, staff, volunteers, community members, and donors and today we want to hear from YOU about your experience with Nellie’s.

Take a moment to fill out this quick survey and tell us what Nellie’s means to you. The responses we collect may be used in our special 40th Anniversary Annual Report!

Whether you’ve been a volunteer, a donor, or have accessed our services, we want to hear from YOU! If you have any questions about this survey or how the responses will be used, please feel free to contact us at info@nellies.org. Thank you in advance for your participation!

Happy Holidays from Nellie’s Shelter!

Posted on: December 21st, 2012 by Nellie's No Comments

On behalf of everyone at Nellie’s Shelter, we would like to say thank you to all our supporters, donors, and volunteers who have made this holiday season happy and bright for all the women and children who are staying with us.

Nellie's Tree

With your kindness and generosity we have been able to provide gifts for over 200 women and children at our shelter and in the community. From workplace toy drives, holiday party fundraisers, and individual support, each and every contribution has made a great difference in the lives of women and children who are facing violence, poverty and homelessness this holiday season.

If you would still like to support the women and children at Nellie’s you can do so by making a financial donation here.

Best wishes for a joyous and happy holidays!

A Mother’s Story: Lorrie

Posted on: May 8th, 2012 by Nellie's No Comments

The tipping point was the day she couldn’t afford a bus ticket because he controlled all the bank accounts. For several months Lorrie had desperately contemplated ways to move her family away from her abusive husband. And things were getting continually worse. The constant yelling; the fits of rage; the hidden bruises.

Most of the time it was directed at her, and she tried to justify the outbursts. Often she wondered if he was right when he said those terrible things…”Maybe I don’t work hard enough. Maybe I shouldn’t be talking to my next-door neighbour. Maybe I am too stupid to get a job,” she thought.

But when the abuse was directed towards their 6 year-old son Josh and their 4-year old daughter Julie, Lorrie knew it wasn’t right. Often when she looked in the mirror at night she felt defeated…and when she saw that same look in her children’s eyes, she knew it was time to make a change. But without a dollar to her name, and no access to a bank account or credit card, she felt like she was imprisoned in her own home. That’s when she came to Nellie’s.

When Lorrie, Josh and Julie came to us last year they had no where else to turn. Lorrie arrived on our doorstep with a gym bag on her shoulder and a child in each hand. But the look on her face was one of determination and resolve – she knew she was taking the first steps towards a better life for herself and her children.

Working with Nellie’s counsellors, Lorrie was able to slowly open up about the abuse she’d experienced and start the healing process for herself and her family. Although the change was difficult for Josh and Julie, with the support of Nellie’s Children’s Advocate they were able to continue attending school and looked forward to coming home to the shelter where there were always fun activities waiting for them.

While Lorrie thought that coming to a shelter meant that she was failing her family, the support and encouragement she received meant Lorrie could continue to be a strong leader and a caring mother to her children. Today, Lorrie, Josh and Julie are doing well. Thanks to the support she received at Nellie’s, Lorrie found gainful employment and a safe place to raise her family. This year will be the best Mother’s Day she’s ever had.

A donation in honour of your own mother or someone special could be the perfect Mother’s Day gift. Please donate now to help women like Lorrie and all the moms staying at Nellie’s shelter have a Happy Mother’s Day.

Only 3 days left to vote for Nellie’s!

Posted on: March 30th, 2012 by Nellie's No Comments

Only 3 days left to vote for Nellie’s to win a new website!

Thanks to you, we’ve made it to the Top 3 in the TBK Creative Website Charity Challenge!

We need your help now to get us into first place to win a total website makeover!

All it takes is a quick visit to this facebook page and a click on the word “vote.”

If you have already voted for us, please forward this blog to your family and friends so they can vote for us too!

Voting closes this Sunday April 1st, so please vote now.

Help us win so that our website can become an easily accessible space where our clients, donors and supporters can come to find and share in the work that we do.

THANK YOU!