Nellie’s was proud to attend the Trans* Day of Remembrance on November 20, 2014 at The 519 Church Street Community Centre.

This year’s event was largely conceived and created by members of Toronto’s LGBT communities, through input gained during a series of drop-in meetings, activities, and trans* programming. Community participation, collaboration, and reflection were therefore an important theme of the evening.

The evening began with a smudging ceremony and delicious communal dinner, providing the packed room of community members a warm, safer space to meet and reconnect with one another over the comfort of sharing food.

Afterwards, seven performers sang, danced, recited reflections, and performed to various upbeat vocals. As song lyrics such as “It’s my time to rise / It’s my time to shine”, “Why’s it so hard to love one another?”, “Let’s make the world a better place for you and for me” and “I will always love you” rang loudly over the speakers, and trans* flags were waved in the audience, a somber mood was apparent. It was largely understood that this was an evening to commemorate and celebrate lives of community members who were no longer living.

Throughout the evening, a list of over 1500 names of trans* community members who had passed away since 1998 was projected onto the walls. Amongst community members, it was understood that this list of 1500 names was not exhaustive, nor indicative of the true number of deaths within trans* communities locally and globally.

Throughout the evening, trans* community members spoke about their experiences of community, connection, discrimination, and loss.

Community members spoke of their connections with their chosen families, over food banks, housing complexes, and community centres.  One trans* woman spoke of her extreme gratitude for The 519, as someone who used their washroom facilities daily as a safer space for her to wash and dress, since 1985. Another woman stated, “twenty seven years ago, we never had this [community space], we celebrated in our corners and our squats”. A 14-year-old community member shared that this was their first time attending an LGBT event, and thanked the generations before them that made it possible for them to identify openly as trans*, even within their school. Another community member spoke of the support they received within the community as someone who transitioned later in life.

Community members also spoke about the discrimination that they faced daily, within stores, on the streets, within community centres, within overarching systems (the legal system, housing and employment) and within broader queer communities. Participants spoke about the importance of carrying the “feeling of care” apparent within the room, outside into the daily lives of their LGBT communities.

A Community Photo Project displayed members of the trans* community, displaying photos of what Trans Day of Remembrance meant to each of them personally. Interactive art projects on the Centre’s walls also commemorated lives lost, which participants were able to contribute to, if they wished. Participants wrote about “the comfort of communal remembering” which was present amongst a room full of people who have lost someone.

The evening ended with a moment of silence, a Community Led Memorial and a Candlelight Vigil, where participants were provided time to publically share their personal memories. Prominent trans* community members who had passed away were remembered. A worker from Sherbourne Health Centre explained to community members that a designated space was being provided until the end of November, as a “grieving space, and space for resilience” for anyone who wished to access it.

Buttons, purple ribbons, and verses were distributed to participants, echoing the importance of the evening. The verse stated: “Please wear this ribbon to remember all the Trans People we have lost this year to violence and suicide. We are your neighbors, we are your brothers and sisters, we are your children. We are Human. The T in LGBT cannot be silent”.

As an organization, Nellie’s felt very fortunate to attend the Trans* Day of Remembrance, and continues to understand the importance of providing members of trans* communities with safer housing accommodations, support, and unconditional acceptance.