Archives for February 2012

Archive for February, 2012

Help Nellie’s Win a Website Makeover!

Posted on: February 23rd, 2012 by Nellie's No Comments

We have a chance to win a website makeover from tbk creative valued at up to $25,000 and we need your help! All it takes is a quick visit to this facebook page and a click on the word “vote.”

Nellie’s website is a shining example of the finest in web design from 2005. With a yellow color that screams at you when you arrive to a single scrolling image across the top of our site, it’s obvious we need a new website! Please see below for photo evidence:

(Our website. Click here to make it better. )

How you can help us:

1) Click on this link to vote.

2) Share your vote on facebook and ask your friends to help us win a new website!

3) Copy, paste, and tweet the following:

Vote @nelliesshelter for CANADA’S WEBSITE CHARITY CHALLENGE and help them win a new one here: http://ow.ly/9fbVX

4) Forward this blog to a friend.

Help Nellie’s website come alive with the same passion, dedication, and commitment that we put into helping women and children escape violence.

Back in December you helped us raise enough money in under 24 hours to replace our boiler at the shelter. We know you can help us win this website. Thank you for your vote.

Love Doesn’t Have To Hurt

Posted on: February 14th, 2012 by Nellie's No Comments

Leaving an abusive situation is never easy.

For women who are being abused by their partners, leaving may mean becoming homeless, being shunned by their families for “not trying hard enough to make the relationship work”, raising children as a single mother, and a constant feeling of “did I do something wrong?” and “what could I have done to make the abuse stop?”

Even though their partner is being abusive to them in the most horrible ways imaginable: hitting, threatening, yelling, pushing, swearing, intimidating, kicking, etc, they may still love this person and hope that they will change. As well, the most dangerous time for a woman is an abusive relationship is when she attempts to leave her partner. which does not make the decision any easier.

If you are in an abusive relationship or worried about someone who is, please pay attention to these common signs of abuse:

– You feel like you have to “walk on eggshells” to keep someone from getting angry and are frightened by their temper

– You stop seeing other friends or family, or give up the activities you enjoy because they don’t approve

– You feel you are the only one who can help your partner and that you should try to “fix” them

– You find yourself apologizing to yourself and others for your partner’s behavior when you are treated badly

– You believe that their jealousy and control is a sign of love

– You believe the critical things that are said to you and you feel bad about yourself

This Valentine’s Day, if you are in abusive situation, we want you to know that:

Love doesn’t have to hurt,

Love should never hurt.

If you are being hurt, we are here to help you.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLcZJOaTfWc&list=HL1329230854&feature=mh_lolz]

If you are in an abusive situation and you need help RIGHT NOW, please call our crisis line at 416-461-1084 or the Assaulted Women’s Helpline at 416-863-0511. Both lines are open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. For more important information on signs of abuse, please click here.

Celebrating Black History Month

Posted on: February 9th, 2012 by Nellie's No Comments

February is Black History Month, a time to honour and celebrate the histories of Black, Caribbean and African communities. Black History Week was first recognized in 1926 by Dr. Carter G. Woodson who wanted to raise awareness and understanding in the school curriculum of the African experience around the world. In the 1960s this celebration was expanded to become Black History Month.

This year at Nellie’s our focus is on the history of Black Women. We asked the women at our shelter what this month means to them and how they chose to honour it. This is what they had to say:

Black History Month is…

A reminder of freedom and the suffering that the black community has endured throughout the years, such as slavery, stereotyping, discrimination and isolation. It continues today.
A time to reflect and remember the leaders that have devoted their lives and made changes not only for themselves, but the for the community as a whole. We remember Martin Luther King, Rosa Parks, Malcom X, Harriet Tubman, Marcus Garvey to name a few.
A reminder of the ongoing struggle of the black community and how they still suffer in Canada today. It allows our experiences not to be hidden and give voice to our struggle.
A good remember to raise awareness, fight for changes not only during February but each and every day.
An opportunity to focus on black women’s experiences of intergenerational trauma.
A time to reflect and recognize who our allies were in history.
A time to be reminded to fight for equity and human rights for our communities.
A time to mourn, a time to remember, a time to celebrate and time take action.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7HiE4lt_DUY]

Throughout February we commemorate Black History Month at the shelter. We celebrate by sharing stories from Black, Caribbean and African Women who have fought for change throughout history because we know that many of these powerful stories remain unwritten. Celebrated author and poet Maya Angelou said “We want to reach a time when there won’t be Black History Month, when black history will be so integrated into American history that we study it along with every other history.” During our celebrations we invite women to read aloud her inspirational poem “Still I Rise.” Our hope and commitment at Nellies is that this celebration of Black History will continue beyond February and that anti-racist activism continues until justice is achieved for all.

Nellie’s Women Experiencing Abuse and Violence (W.E.A.V.) Group

Posted on: February 1st, 2012 by Nellie's No Comments

Next week marks the beginning of the first cycle of Nellie’s Women Experiencing Abuse and Violence Support Group (W.E.A.V.) for 2012. This group is open to women in our shelter and in the community who have experienced violence and are ready to talk about it. Through a variety of different topics women come together to gain an understanding of the role violence has played in their lives and develop the tools and skills to recognize and be proactive against violence reoccurring in their lives in the future. One of the most important things women realize while attending this group is that abuse is never the fault of the abused, but arises out of the need of the abuser to have control over another person.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IdTEY42RxYM]
(Video made by Grade 10 students for Nellie’s YPI Project)

Some of the topics covered during the 12 sessions of this group include: achieving goals, beginning new relationships, the cycle of violence, parenting, starting out on your own, and safety planning. Michelle, a recent participant of Nellie’s W.E.A.V. Group describes her experience as follows: “It was an eye-opening experience for me. I recognized how to avoid situations, when to stand up for myself, and how to transform into a more confident human being. It is wonderful to have others to share stories with, learn from and be supported by.”

At Nellie’s we believe a simultaneous focus on immediate needs such as shelter and health as well as a long-term focus on education and advocacy are the best way to encourage empowerment and independence for all the women and children who come to us for help. Our Women Experiencing Abuse and Violence Group is a core piece of Nellie’s educational programming and offers participants an opportunity to not only learn from our staff facilitators, but most importantly to learn from each other and develop peer relationships that often continue once the group is finished.